Mental Suicide
by Sammyisdabomb
Summary: Sammy struggles with depression... what will save her from suicide? What else gets thrown into the mix?
1. Chapter 1

It was just another normal day, same as every other day. I groan, sit up and get ready for another day of torture. Heather was at it again and she was getting vicious. Now that I had a movie star dad (Darren Cole) I have a cell phone and me and grams have a computer! So naturally I have a facebook, and I have alot of friends from school. Ever since my dad "claimed" me more people have wanted to be around me.

I walk into school, and looked around to find Heather. I saw her walking down the hallway and quickly ran the other way. Every day was a fight, I needed to feel like I belonged and Heather made my depression worse. I needed to talk to Casey, he always made me feel better. I turn the corner lost in thought, "Hi Sammy-Keysta!" I jump about 20 feet in the air.

"Billy! I told you to stop doing that!" I yell at him.

"Sorry Sammy-Keyesta, how you doin'?" He says and gives me puppy dog eyes and a goofy smile.

"I'm better Billy really, I told you guys to stop worrying about me!"

"Casey wants you to meet him in the graveyard after school."

I tell him thanks and head off to class. I just kept praying that the next person I ran into wasn't Heather.

**A/N: Srry for the SUPER short chapter...comment if I should continue :)**


	2. Chapter 2

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walked into science class, trying not to look over at Heather's desk. I sit down and steal a look at her. She's texting like a mad woman, as I'm looking at her she suddenly looks up. She sees me turn my head and smirks, like she was getting a new plan. Then her phone vibrates, she looks down at it and scowls, then goes back to flying her thumbs across the keyboard.  
Marissa sees me looking at her and quickly comes over to say hi. She does her little dance when the teacher tells her to be quiet and she sits down. Heather is starting to make me nervous, she keeps glancing at me in between texts. I had to stay focused! I'm slipping behind in science and I need to keep my grades up.

I start my ride to the graveyard like every day, put my headphones in and listen to my dad singing. I must admit, I loved my dad and it is pretty cool that he's famous and all... I guess. Once you get past all those annoying fan girls and such.  
I walked into the grave yard and immediately saw Casey. I ran over to him and give him a huge hug and a quick kiss. "How are you doing Sammy?"  
"AWFUL! Casey I don't know how much longer I can hold on... It's just heather is making me paranoid, every time I see her it looks like she's plotting my murder! I don't want her to be the one to kill me!"  
"Sams, calm down I won't let her do anything to you." He hugged me and gently patted my back.  
"You know what Case?"  
"What Sammy?"  
"I love you, and thank you so much. You're the reason I've held on this long."

"Grams! I'm back, where are you?"  
"I'm right here Sammy, do you have any homework?"  
"Yeah grams, I'm just gonna use the computer in your bedroom to do some research and such."  
I booted up the computer and the first thing I do is log into my email and check my Facebook (typical homework). I laugh at some of Billy's posts and comment on Marissa's picture. When I look at my own wall I freeze. There in The middle of my wall for all to see, was a post from Heather.  
And she had gone way too far this time.  
A/N: the suspense ooh! What did Heather say to get so mad? What is with all this talk of holding on and letting go? OooooOOOooo spooky... End A/N.  
Right in the middle of my wall she'd written: "I don't know how this ugly girl has lived with her Grandmother for so long! She's an awful person really, she's punched multiple people in the nose and, she an awful "tattler" Personally I don't understand why she's still around. She should just go off to Hollywood and live with her mom. Oh yeah, and she's "dating" my brother. She thinks he's actually in love with her? Please, he just feels sorry for her! I recommend you all unfriend her she's such a loser."  
I try to tell myself they're just lies, but 34 people had unfriended me. I suddenly felt weighed down, like there wasn't anything that would get me out of this one. I needed to talk to Casey, I grabbed my cell and called Billy and asked him if he'd seen Heather's post.  
"Yeah, I saw it but none of that is true! C'mon Sammy Keyesta she basically took the facts and twisted them! What about all the awful things she's done?"  
"Yeah, Billy you're right. It's just so hard because 34 people unfriended me after that post."  
"Who cares? Does it really matter how many friends you have on Facebook? Sammy you better snap yourself outta this or I'm going to have to talk to your grams!"  
"You're right Billy, thanks! And hey can you ask Casey to meet me at the graveyard again tomorrow?"  
"Sure thing Sammy Keyesta!"  
I tried to convince myself that billy was right, but I felt awful about myself, and my life. The was the night I cut my wrists.  
A/N: So... This chapter is longer, I was VERY disappointed in the amount of reviews. Thank you though, AnneWalker and Cam Lol. I'm trying to update as often as possible but the content barrier on my school laptop blocks fanfic... And I have no other way to update. I write on my IPod Touch and then email it to myself, which I then open on my grandmom's computer. Once I have the email I just copy and paste it... And Viola! My story has been updated! Ok srry for the LONG Author's Note...  
COMMENT! AND I CAN'T UPDATE UNTIL THAT WHOLE PROCESS REPEATS WHICH IS LIKE A WEEK! ALSO CAM PLZ UPDATE AND U TOO ANNEWALKER EVERYONE ELSE JUST LIKE... VANISHED  
This chapter was done being written 11/1/13

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	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I DO NOT have depression, and I don't have suicidal thoughts... Ever! Just**  
**to let u guys know ;) I'm glad that some of you guys can connect to this**  
**story... I'm trying to pour every amount of emotion as I can into this story...**  
**End A/N!**

I wore long sleeves to school the next day, in an attempt to  
hide my marred wrists. I didn't want to care if anyone saw the pain I was  
inflicting on myself. I know I had to though, if any of my friends saw they  
would make a big deal. No one would understand, this didn't seem worth it! I  
could easily end it all, I had a bottle of painkillers in my backpack. Something  
kept me here though, Casey.

I was listening to my iPod on shuffle when  
Much Like Falling (by Flyleaf) came on and I heard the part where she  
sings:  
_"He pointed out how selfish, it would be to kill myself. SO I KEEP_  
_WAKING UP!"_

I connected so well with that song, it would be selfish.  
Grams and Casey, Marissa and Billy, they all care about me and they would be  
devastated. So I continued on my normal day at school, until Science class. As  
soon as I walked in Heather came over and said

"Did you like my comment  
I left for you? I thought you would appreciate it if I told people about your  
few strengths!" She high-fives Monet and goes back to her seat. I sink in my  
chair, wrists throbbing. Not knowing how much longer I could wait until talking  
with Casey. Also not knowing if I could talk to Casey, would he be mad about  
what I've done?

**A/N: DIVIDING LINE... OOO! Srry I get so annoyed when**  
**ppl do this! Ha! Lol hehe! Ok End A/N!**

"Casey!" I walk over and give him  
a huge hug.

"What? No kiss?" He jokes, "Sams are you ok?"

"Yeah... Of course... I'm-"

"Sammy! Billy told me about what  
heather said, he told me about your conversation last night! He told me  
everything, are. you. ok. sammy?" He gave me this really intense look.

I started to sob, I tried not to ever let ANYONE see me cry. Not even my dad, but  
I couldn't hold it in. "Casey I'm so sorry! I know I shouldn't but I'm thinking  
about suicide, OFTEN! I have a full bottle of pain killers In my backpack and-"  
I show him my wrists.

"Sammy," he starts but he chokes up and hugs me  
tight, "I will always love you so much, please don't do this." He stops talking  
and I just sit quietly in his arms, I feel a tear leak onto my arm. I suddenly  
realized he was crying too.

"I could never imagine leaving you." I tell  
him with a sigh, and I pull out of his embrace to look at him. He gives me a  
smile and says, "And I never want you to go."

**A/N: srry lots of dividing**  
**lines...! I love this corny love story, I rly enjoy writing about Sammy's pain**  
**cause I can feel it myself. End A/N.**

"Grams I'm back!"

"Samantha,  
where were you?"

"The graveyard with Casey..."

"Oh! Ok, I was  
starting to be worried. Any homework tonight?"

"Not much, it's a  
Thursday! Just a history worksheet, I'll do it in the bedroom." I walk in and  
take a seat, I go back and forth on whether or not I should go on Facebook. I  
decide yes, and I suddenly see a volley of anonymous messages.

"Go drink  
bleach"

"You're so ugly, you couldn't be pretty if you went to beauty  
school!"

"Go get a day job"

"Everything about your stupid life is  
fake!"

The list went on and on, with some unkind language I would rather  
not repeat. I saw comments from Billy and Holly saying:

"Take your own  
advice"

"She doesn't need to go to you're stupid beauty school!" And so  
on...

I really have the best friends ever!  
I didn't feel any better  
though, I couldn't believe the amount of hate I was getting. I knew it had  
something to do with heather but I still couldn't believe she was THIS vicious!  
I cried myself to sleep without dinner, willing myself not to take the pills.  
And trying not to hurt myself again.

I went through another normal, awful  
day at school, I could tell my friends were worried about me. I didn't eat lunch  
but I drank a glass or 2 of water, I'd skipped breakfast too. I couldn't meet  
Casey today, he had baseball after school. So I had to endure the day without  
the knowledge and hope of talking to him that afternoon. I finally couldn't take  
it anymore Heather was Trolling me and I just couldn't take it!

I went to  
the girl's bathroom, got in a stall and waited until I was COMPLETELY alone. I  
reached into my back pack and downed some of them pills. I walked out of the  
stall to look at myself in the mirror for what I thought would be my last time.  
As things start to get fuzzy Sasha walks in, screams, and drops her phone when  
she sees me on the floor. She quick picked it up and placed a call, "911 yes I'm  
fine, no my classmate sammy! i just walked into the bathroom and she's-". I lost  
consciousness. My first suicide attempt had been grounded.

**A/N: srry if**  
**my chapters aren't that long... I like to keep the suspense going! I'm actually**  
**getting really attached to this story and *tear* it's making me emotional! I**  
**hope you guys aren't bothered by the whole Sammy not eating thing... . I just**  
**enjoy rambling on and on cause I love you all so much! :). Hehehehehe ok I'm**  
**done Nowz. Comment! I'm pretty much done the next chapter so... If I can get**  
**back to my grandmom's computer again soon... I'll have an AMAZING update! Tehehe**  
**LUV YA ALL!**

**This chapter was finished being written 11-2-13**  
**(10:25pm)**

**Oh srry 1 more thing... Does anyone know if it's possible to**  
**POST new stories from an IPad mini? I need to know cause I might get 1 for**  
**Christmas and I rly want to be able to post! :) Love y'all**


	4. Chapter 4

Casey's POV

I was packing up my bat bag after baseball when I got the  
first call. It was Billy, he told me about how Sammy overdosed on painkillers in  
the girl's bathroom. She was at the hospital now, she was in good steady  
condition. I started to rush and told my coach I had to run to the hospital and  
asked him for a ride. On the way over I got the second call, this time it was  
Heather.

"Hello? Heather, I can't deal with you right now! Sammy's in  
the-"

"Hospital! Yeah I get it, she's pathetic... Just when things were  
starting to look up for her she has to go and kill herself." Heather is talking  
about this so casually, it's making me angry!

I seethed  
"Heather, why  
don't you meet me at the hospital? Billy says she's going to be fine, but I want  
to see her for myself."

"Ok Case, I'll come to say goodbye to your  
pathetic girlfriend." And with that she hung up.

When I got to the  
hospital I thanked my coach, and ran the the receptionist desk.

"My name  
is Casey Acosta, I came to see Sammy Keyes."

"Do you know Samantha  
Keyes?"

"Yes, she's my girlfriend." I was getting frustrated.

"Hmm, ok fill this out." She hands me a clipboard, "oh and do you have a  
criminal record?"

"No!" I say exasperated, I sit down and fill out my 50  
question survey. When I'm finally done its been 20 minutes and heather finally  
showed up! Turns out she didn't have to do ANY paperwork and so she was able to  
walk right in with me.

Sammy was laying in the hospital bed, eyes closed.  
My heart skipped a couple beats, the nurse walked in.

"Don't worry  
sweetie! She's just sleeping, they had to pump all of the pills out of her  
stomach. She's going I be fine, she's bound to wake up any minute."

And  
she did, half an hour later she opened her eyes and I'd never loved to color  
green more! I ran over to her and took her hand. She tried to sit up but quickly layed  
back down,

"Casey, I'm so sorry!" The tears were flowing down her cheeks  
and I know how much she hates crying. "I couldn't take it anymore! I didn't  
think it was worth staying! I'm so thankful for Sasha, she walked in just as I  
went unconscious. I woke up here!"

"Shhh... Take a deep breath.  
Everything's going to be fine Sams! Where's billy? He's the one that called me."

"I think he's at the food court, go ahead and get him. He'll be happy to  
know he's no longer alone with marissa, she's hyperventilating!"

"Heather's gonna stay in here with you ok? She has something she needs  
to say to you." I look in heather's directing a mouth the words "say you're  
sorry"  
She mouths back "for what?"  
I sigh "for trolling her, and spamming  
her with awful messages".

"CASEY ACOSTA I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TELLING HER  
TO DO AND SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO! AN APOLOGY HAS TO CONE FROM THE HEART, AND IF  
YOU'RE MAKING HER DO IT THEN IT'S NOT A REAL APOLOGY!"

"Ok you're  
right Sammy! I'll go save billy."

I walk out an go to find billy and  
marissa in the cafe.

**A/N; NOW the tables r turned BAHAHA! I'm **  
**switching to Heather's POV thanks to Cam and Anne! They're my fanfic compadres **  
**(idk if I spelled that right) tehe this is just a dividing line :P End **  
**A/N.**

Heather's POV! :)

As soon as Casey left I took a closer look  
at Sammy, she looks weak and defeated. Like she just gave up on everything,  
which I guess she did. I should just leave now and go over Danny's or something.

"Look I'm sorry about your depression and about saying those supposed  
mean things. What about all the awful  
Things you've done though? I feel like  
even at home I'm alway living in YOUR shadow. Plus it's not my fault you have  
depression right? Right!?" By this time I was getting kind of worked up.

"Heather! I'm sorry ok? I didn't ask for any of this and I never tried  
to invade your family!"

"Your mom sure did! Every opportunity she got  
she said something rude about our house and such! Like she thought we didn't  
know about your situation!"

"Heather, you mean you don't  
know?"

"Know what!? Of course I know!"

"My mom... She's dead. She  
was diagnosed with lung cancer, but she refused to do kimo-therapy (she didn't  
want to lose her hair) and she well died. Three months after her diagnosis."

"Sammy! That's awful, I'm really sorry I didn't mean-" she looked at me  
suddenly, shocked. "at Brandon's party, you saved my life. And when I heard  
about this (gestures to Sammy's hospital bed) I felt like I'd Finally won!"

"I wouldn't blame you... I guess I haven't been real easy to deal with  
either."

"You haven't done ANYTHING wrong compared to all I've done to  
you!" I started crying, like a stupid little girl. "I'm sorry Sammy, I'm so so  
sorry!"

"Oh, Heather I-"

"I have to go... I'm rly sorry!"

And with that I ran out the door, past Casey, Billy, and Marissa and out  
the door. I didn't stop running until I got to Danny's house. I knocked, but he  
didn't answer I knocked and knocked and knocked! I tried his cell 1, 2, 3, 4, he  
won't pick up. The tears won't stop in every message I leave. I walk home  
feeling alone, and guilty.

**A/N: sorry guys this chapter is so short! **  
**It's rly just a filler chapter, so... Yeah! I love my BFB (Best Fanfic Buddies) **  
**Cam an Anne! (Anne Walker and... Cam) I can't spell cam's Username so... I'm **  
**done trying lol! I'll update ASAP... Comment the love! 3 **

**PS Anne made the pic for this story so... Everyone comment on her AWESOME stories! oh and tell cam to update! ;)**


	5. Chapter 5

Back to Sammy's POV

I finally got home after being in the hospital for a very long week. I vowed not to hurt myself again, and I went back to my normal life. After a week back at school though, I was cutting my wrists again. No one could show any sympathy for my situation. Everyone treated me like crap, and made me feel awful all over again. The only thing keeping me going was Casey.

"Sammy, u have to come pweese!" Casey pleaded. He was having a surprise party for Billy's Birthday and I didn't want to go.

"Casey! How do u know they will treat me differently than they do during school? I can barely deal with It during school, and definately not after school too!"

"Please Sammy? You don't have to leave my side all night, we can be together the whole time. If anyone says anything to you I'll kick them Half the way around the world!"

"Fine Casey, I'll come. I really don't want to though, Danny won't be there will he?"

"His parents paid his bail yesterday, so he has to come. He's the only person Heather asked for. Plus even though he's stupid, he's my friend and I have to invite him." I swore and Casey quickly corrected me.

"Casey, what if he tries to hurt you for turning him in?"

"I'll be fine." He gives me a quick peck on the cheek and says, "Now go get some rest, I'll be back at 6:30 to pick up." And He drove away.

Casey picked me up and we got to the party late. There were already a TON of people there, Danny wasn't there yet though. When Billy arrived we all jumped out and yelled "SURPRISE!" After that we danced, played some party games, and ate a LOT of cake. The next person that walked through the door wasn't in a very good mood, he'd decided to bring a gun to the party.

**A/N: This is an EXTREMELY SHORT chapter srry I'm like so super busy with school my brain is on overload. I'm trying to develop this story but... I'm having trouble finding time to write and update . Srry Anne and Cam, just email me and I'll stay up later to write my part for the collab. Love y'all and please update any thoughts! 3**


	6. Chapter 6

Mental suicide chapter 6

As soon as he walked in Casey bolted to the  
kitchen. My only thought was, 'he won't take Casey, he won't take Casey? HE  
WON'T TAKE CASEY!' I decided Casey would not be harmed tonight, I decided I  
would protect him at any cost. Heather knew what was going on, she immediately  
started pleading with him.

"Danny, NO! Please Danny, DANNY! You're out  
now right? If you do something crazy you'll be stuck back in the slammer! You're  
safe here. We can be together, don't you want that?" Heather screams to be heard  
over the music, someone immediately turns it off.

"No I don't, you can't  
take a hint! I've tried everything to shake you, every awful thing I've done and  
you STILL haven't left me. Why?"

"I love you Danny, I will always love  
you." Heather says softly. A couple of days ago I would NEVER believe you if you  
told me this was Heather. I'd sooner believe she'd been hypnotized or something,  
but I can tell she means it. Apparently Danny does too because he drops the gun  
on the ground and envelopes Heather in the biggest hug he could possibly give. I  
may or may not have teared up at this point.

"We cool man?" Casey says  
as he walks out of the kitchen.

"Yeah, it was going to be hard killing  
you bro."

"I missed you too?"  
Now their reunion was great and all  
but I looked over and saw that the gun was still on the floor. Just as this was  
registering as dangerous-weapon-lying-on-the-floor-in boyfriend's living room, I  
see a hand pick it up.

I stagger back shocked and move over to Casey  
just as the trigger is pulled. I collapse on the ground sharp pain coming from  
my upper chest, and again I'm pulled into the deep black.

**DIVIDING **  
**LINE! HEHEHEHEHE I'M SO TIRED WHILE I'M WRITING THISS. I'M REALLY WRITING THIS **  
**FOR MY BFBs SOOO... END DIVIDING LINEE!**

I woke up 3 days later in a  
hospital bed. Casey sat in a small chair next to my bed with red eyes, holding  
my hand.

"What happened?" I say as I try to sit up, I can't move my body  
so I just keep laying down.

"Taylor Briggs picked up Danny's gun and took  
a shot at me. You caught the bullet in your shoulder, you've been out for 3  
days. In that time they've given you 2 surgeries, and Taylor has been locked  
up."

"Wow... You know, people must really not like you!" I say with a  
smirk.

"I thought once you are OUT of high school you can say 'all my  
friends are Dead or in jail' well that's happening to me now And I'm only a  
junior!" I could tell Casey was really upset, he doesn't usually rant unless  
he's angry.

"Case I'm fine, everything is going to be fine. Danny didn't  
kill you... And he's not in jail right? Where is the happy couple anyways?"

"Food court, Heather is really emotional... Despite her objections I'm  
going to suggest a pregnancy test."

"Wow, well that's big news... I'm  
really tired why don't you catch a few winks? Looks like you haven't slept in  
days!" I yawn and quickly fall back asleep, into a lighter shade of grey.

" I haven't Sammy," he says and kisses the top of my head  
lightly.

**A/N: srrryyyy I had writers block for legit 2 weeks... Anyways **  
**I wrote this after being on an emotional high from reading the Hunger Games all **  
**weekend and, well... I couldn't bear the thought of separating our "star-crossed **  
**lovers" I cried the whole hunger games series... ( Which I read in 3 days! not a **  
**good idea btw)And this chapter is KINDA emotional so... DON'T JUDGE ME! Good **  
**night**


	7. Chapter 7

I woke up and looked at Casey, he had his head at the foot of my hospital bed and he was still holding my hand. He was such an amazing friend I tear up just thinking about it and watch him for awhile longer. After about an hour of this, a nurse walks in. So... I know what you're probably thinking, we'll go back to living our lives and everything will be peachy, right? WRONG! The nurse asks if I'm feeling better, I say yes and she asks we more questions like that.

"Would you like us to call a wheelchair, so you can take a walk?" The nurse says so softly, it's almost a whisper.

"It's not a walk if I'm in a wheel chair, why don't I just walk?" I say frustrated.

"Sams," Casey must have woken up, "you didn't realize did you?"

"Realize what?" I look between him and the nurse, deciding who I should be more mad at.

"There's no easy way to tell her this," The nurse still talks in barely a whisper.

"Sammy," Casey finds the courage some how (**A/N I WANT CASEY HE IS SO COURAGEOUS) **"you're quadriplegic."

"So? What does that mean?"

"You're paralyzed from the shoulders down." Casey says in a gentle voice.

My head spins, I didn't even notice! I'm even more useless now! Who's gonna want to be around me, a quadra-penguin or whatever. I start sputtering and Casey envelopes me in a hug.

"Casey? Will you still love me? Even if I'm a quadra-pepper thingy?" I look at him nervously.

"Of course Sammy don't be stupid! Through think and thin I'll always be here, I don't care if I have to wheel you around school, to Maynard's, anywhere you want to go! I'll stay with you always." He gives me one of his classic grins.

"Casey," I choke out, "I can't even hug you back!" I start sobbing, for some reason this is the most tragic part. Not being about to hug Casey seems like the worst possible punishment.

"Shhh," Casey gently tries to sooth me, "You don't need to hug me back for me to know you love me." I smile and look at the nurse as if to say 'you can't have him'

Just then Danny and Heather come back with Marissa and Billy.

"Did you tell her yet?" Marissa says without making eye contact.

"Yes," Casey sighs, "she's agreed that you can be her nurse, and help her do EVERYTHING she can't." I look over at Casey and smile, I know exactly what he's doing.

"What? I'm not even certified! I can't, I mean... I won't ... I mean..."

"Calm down! He's just kidding, you don't have to do anything for me!" after that there was a lull in conversation and everyone looked awkwardly around.

"Well,". Heather breaks the silence, "the pregnancy test was positive."

"That's great you guys! Wait that's good right?" Marissa says confused.

"No not good! They're not even out of high school! How could you guys do this and expect to be let off easy?" Casey says angrily.

"Relax case! My mom had me before she was married or out of high school, and look how good I turned out!" I joke

"True..."

"Guys it's not Danny's baby... It's Taylor's." We stare at Heather in silence.

**A/N: hehehehehehehhe this is a crazy chapter update! Bet you didn't see that coming! Hehehehehehehhe Idk if anyone could c my new story ..? Anyways EVERYONE NEEDS TO UPDATE AND COMMENT BECAUSE I KEEP THINKING EVERYONE IS DEAD!**


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